How Living in the Future Feeds Into Becoming Emotionally Unstable

How Living in the Future Feeds Into Becoming Emotionally Unstable

It’s one o’clock in the morning, and you’re finding yourself still awake. Your mind is racing about what happened today, and how it will impact tomorrow.

So much for sleep because you know you won’t get any. Options appear in your head, spend the next 30 minutes scrolling through Netflix to find something to watch, maybe search random videos on YouTube, or promise yourself 2 games of Clash Royal thinking you will hit 4000 trophies this time. Hell, anything to get your mind away from what it’s sitting on now.

Stress has pretty much been a constant since you got home, and now you’re asking yourself if you’re emotionally unstable, what does that mean? It sounds like a depressing word.

According to Wikipedia emotionally unstable, “Is just a phrase to say that a person might react unpredictably to events and situations. Where someone might be upset or a little angry at something an emotionally unstable person could react violently or destructively.”

No shit. What it doesn’t state is how, and why?

Welcome to lingering on the past, existing in the present, and living in the future, aka chaos in my opinion.

A friend’s text message

It’s 10:39 P.M. on a Tuesday night, luckily I’m tired, and excited about getting a deeper sleep. I hear a buzz, phone lights up the room. A friend of mine from college text me saying, “I think I have a sleeping problem,” you and I both. I roll over text her back and ask, what’s up?

She can’t sleep and doesn’t know what to do. She states, “I’m planning my life all at once and it drives me into work mode. I watch T.V., I read, and I even work out. Nothing helps, and I don’t want to take medication because I know I’ll abuse it, and alcohol, well let’s be real.”

I find myself giving her some line about each day is a new day, you don’t know what will come, therefore you can’t know exactly how to take it on. So why are you so worried about it?

“Sacrifices,” she begins pouring into this novel of a text. “I can be ambitious and go for everything I’ve ever dreamed of but in doing so, I would kiss my chance of ever starting a family goodbye. I have so many walls and I know I’ll only reinforce them as time passes by.”

She goes on to say she isn’t broken, but is she? What constitutes as accepting emotional instability?

Why does she think just by achieving her dream, it will ultimately end in not having a family? She hasn’t even gotten to that point in her life yet.

I give you this bit, because at one point I was asking myself these same questions. If I do A then I will sacrifice B, therefore resulting in C. The crazy thing, none of this had happened yet, but I was already living in that time. Of course it would cause stress, because I didn’t have any proof it would happen like that or it wouldn’t.

I by no means have it all figured out. I still find myself asking some questions every once in awhile, and indirectly dropping it on my friends or girlfriend. I am aware this is not good, and can influence a negative perspective. So, how do I get better at it and start living a happier lifestyle? I don’t ponder it, I let it fly by like a bird and allow it to soar into the abyss.

So, if you’re still reading you’re probably asking HOW THE HELL DO YOU DO THIS??

Enter, a technique of leaving the future and entering the present

1.) Have a drink

I know you’re probably asking… What? Let me explain, too often we take each day for granted. You wake up in the morning rushing around, thinking about what you’re going to do today. I have this to do, and that, which will effect this and that, see the pattern? Stop… make a coffee, or tea, sit down and do something else other than think.

Some options; update yourself on current events, work out, meditate, or do nothing, and just drink.

When you get home, repeat the process. Maybe use a beer or wine in place of.

2.) Don’t let people influence you so much

This is a tough one. Too often we let people dictate our days by living what they tell us. Your boss tells you something you don’t like, your co-worker said this in this way, or maybe you interpreted everything all wrong, and now are letting it get to you.

Something you need to realize in this situation, it’s one moment of 42,048,000 minutes, given that you live until 80 years old 🙂

What I am saying, is practice letting things go, and addressing the immediate situation. Don’t think too much, nor linger too long. In an overall perspective, it matters very little and it’s not worth your mental health.

3.) Find “Your” thing

Find something you like to do as an escape plan. Ideally, while doing this thing it will automatically pull your mind somewhere else. It doesn’t matter what it is as long as it works. It can be watching an episode of a show, playing a game, learning a language, or writing a song.

Something I will say, is make sure you are committing some time to it. It will slowly make you realize that you are living in the present, and ignoring what is going on around you and how it will impact you in the future.


My friend is fine, FYI. We are learning this together, and she is smart. As we go through our lives we will continue to learn new things, and implement new strategies.

Being emotionally unstable, can be detrimental to a successful and happy life. It’s too easy to get caught up in things, and not only that but let them really take over our lives.

We live in a difficult world, where social media is prevalent and can influence our decisions and understandings.

One thing I can offer is don’t take for granted each day you’re given, surround yourself with people who bring out the best in you, find something that will impact your life in a positive way, and just have a drink.

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